BREAKING NEWS! - "I'm Ron Burgundy and here is what is happening in your world San Die...err, Fort Worth. In the news today, an alien spacecraft appeared over Amon Carter stadium and kidnapped the entire TCU Horned Frogs football team, taking them to Zeta Reticuli 5 to teach the Zeta Reticulans how to play the galactically great defense TCU is famous for so they can win the Star Trek Bowl on New Orbit's Day against the 2nd ranked Alpha Centauri Squigglers. Alien Head Coach I. M. Pointy later released a press statement saying that not even they were stupid enough to try to kidnap Coach Patterson, and the players would be returned to our planet in time for Spring camp.
That is what is happening in your world today. Stay classy Fort Worth; I'm Ron Burgandy?"
|Coach Pointy- Head Coach of the Zeta Reticuli Critters|
Okie Lite's fans seemed to acknowledge this. TCU ran an ad about the renewed rivalry in the Stillwater newspaper that was deemed on Orangepower.com as "very classy", although others seemed to blame the Frogs for censoring the "paddle people" at OSU for all future Big 12 games (don't ask). Other fans seem to have been very impressed that Randle was the first person all year to put up more than 100 yards rushing against the Frogs, stating essentially that despite the odd year TCU is having, they are still monsters on defense. Those OSU fans seem pretty perceptive after all. Another astute OSU observer wrote that " they looked really big and fast. I think we scored 36 points on a very good defense." I am starting to like these OSU folks a little bit. The general response from most OSU fans had a general tone of surprise that OSU did nearly as well as they did against the Frogs, as if they were expecting far worse.
The renewed rivalry between TCU and Okie State is going to be an intense one - both on the field and in recruiting - but it also is shaping up to be one of class and mutual respect. That is a good way to start the future. Unless the world ends on Dec 21 when the Mayan fourth quarter ends.
The two new teams on the block, both of whom are having interesting first years, meet next week in what is sure to be feet and feet of snow in Morgantown, thanks to the Frankenstorm that is currently eating New York and New England (I wonder if the aliens had anything to do with that as well...hmmm). If the game is not cancelled, moved to Fort Worth or otherwise affected by the storm then the snow might prove to be something of an equalizer as football turns into an outdoor version of something played on ice with a football - call it foothockey or hockball or flockey or something. Predicting this one is a toss up, but the Frogs are due a break. Be sure to bring your ice skates if you go to the game. And a thick jacket. And your long johns. Frogs win by one point.
Of course the Frogs are the classiest program in the league, and the nation - that is why the Frogs never lose, we just occasionally get outscored. Winning is what Coach Patterson does in the way he teaches, coaches and lives with his team - class always wins, whatever the score. In this Year of the Great Bizzar0, we need to remember that win or lose on the field, class and integrity is what counts and makes winners off of it, and the Frogs have an abundance of both.