Friday, August 19, 2011

Yes-ter-day was Thursday, Thursday...

If you're checking Spit Blood before you get out of the office on Friday, or during the weekend- we thank you. And here are a few nuggets for you to read...wherever you're reading us:

-Deadspin presents The Hater's Guide to the Top 25. Warning: there's a good chance you'll be offended at some point while reading that, but remember that people that get offended easily are usually stupid.

-The new Texas Monthly features this great article about Gary Patterson. Way to give your product away for free, print industry. Although, rumor has it that some friends of Spit Blood may be on the cover, so perhaps it's worth purchasing.

-Are you excited about the Big East? Check out what Georgetown's basketball team did on their Goodwill Trip to China. Impressive! Better moment for Hoya basketball: fighting chinese people, pretending to be an elite school while Allen Iverson was enrolled, or "Who wants to sex Mutombo?" ?

-And finally, if you're confused as to how much longer we all have to wait for the TCU season opener, The Governator can fill you in.

New Promo Video

Great job by TCU RTVF alumnus Red Sanders and his team at Red Productions on this video.

Top Moments of the GP Era: #6

Throughout the 2003 season, the Frogs continued to escape potential loss after potential loss, getting themselves to 9-0 and ranked #10 in the polls before the last home game against Cincinnati on November 15, 2003. For the second time in four years, the Fiesta Bowl was rumored to be considering inviting the Frogs to their game, and their title sponsor Tostito's paid tribute by putting a bag of chips in every seat of Amon G. Carter Stadium. For anyone that was present, the "Chip Game" was a pretty memorable experience.

Adding to the excitement of the game was that the opponent, Cincinnati, had beaten the Frogs in the previous year's season opener- a game that many felt TCU had dominated, only to let slip away in the final moments. They were also one of three schools, along with Louisville and South Florida, that had announced earlier in the year that they were departing for the Big East, forcing TCU's hand in leaving a league that most Frog fans were happy with at the time.

Cincinnati moved the ball fairly well on the Horned Frog D on their first possession, gaining 48 yards before settling for a 49-yard field goal attempt. That kick was blocked by the Frogs, and Mark Walker scooped it up and ran it back deep into Bearcat territory. And with the first big play of the game, there went the chips. Yellow bags of chips were being tossed EVERYWHERE by fans. After a 23-yard Nick Browne field goal made it 3-0 TCU, Kenny Boyd scooped up a blocked punt and took it 6 yards to the house- giving the Frogs a 10-0 lead and sending the crowd into further snack-distributing pandemonium.

In the second quarter, the two teams traded field goals (with Cincinnati's coming from Chris Manfredini, who would later transfer to TCU) as well as touchdowns: a 56-yard bomb from Gino Guildugli to Hannibal Thomas and a 22-yard run by Brandon Hassell. It was 20-10 at halftime, keeping the excited crowd a little bit at bay, wondering if this would be another close call by the team who is probably still making cardiologists in Fort Worth wealthy.

TCU's first possession of the second half ended with punter John Braziel pinning the Bearcats at their own 4 yard line. On 3rd & 11 from the 3, Bo Schobel blew by his man and obliterated Guidugli for a safety, causing another Tostito's snowstorm. In the euphoria of the moment, however, people eventually realized that Schobel had caused a fumble the was covered by Martin Patterson. Five 'bonus' points + realizing that things are just going to go the Frogs way today = mass hysteria.

Cincinnati was done after that. The Bearcats managed just 54 yards combined over their next three drives while Nick Browne slowly built the lead, in 3-poin increments, up to 36-10. Chris Peoples picked a pass off with just over 7:00 remaining and returned it deep into Cincinnati territory, and two plays later Robert Merrill scored on a 19-yard run to finish the scoring in an emphatic 43-10 blowout that is one of the few times I've seen a TCU crowd have a real effect on an opponent. The unique added factor of the chips in the atmosphere of a team giving a huge F-U to the national media that had been hating on them all year long, while perhaps a little overrated, was truly unforgettable. It is one of the favorite afternoons I've ever spent at Amon Carter Stadium, so that's why I put it this high on the list.

Could SMU Receive The Death Penalty Twice?

Steve Earle? An SMU fan? Heartbreaking.

By now we're all pretty well-versed in the whole Nevin Shapiro-nerdiest white dude name ever?- situation going on down in Coral Gables. If not, Yahoo! Sports' investigative breakdown is, pardon my French, pretty fucking unreal. Like, if there is Pulitzer Prize for investigative journalism, Charles Robinson is probably on the short list. Shapiro's transgressions went so unchecked and run so deep that the NCAA has gone so far as to suggest the Death Penalty, an act that was so devastating to SMU's football program they pretty more swore they would never use it again, is almost certainly on the table. Something REALLY bad is going to happen to that program if the NCAA has any wits about them - unclear - which, combined with the proposed SEC manifest destiny, could mean the end of the ACC as we know it.

Regardless of what happens, though, once Shapiro gets out of the joint and can sit properly after all the "attention" he gets, he's going to need a new football program to make his pet project as he most certainly will never be allowed within 50 miles of Miami ever again. Unsurprisingly, he's found a suitor and it looks like he's already started laying the ground work. Fortunately for us, he chose one of our oldest friends in our own backyard.

Shapiro did a lot of things for these players who he assumed were his friends - bought engagement rings, offered private yacht rides, threw parties at his house, five star meals, etc - but his calling card, the two things that he spent the most money on, were hookers and strippers, which actually kind of go hand in hand if we're being honest. Everyone loves strippers. Nerdy white dudes with lots of disposable income and the desire to be hangers on really love strippers. And 18 year old high caliber athletes? Their love for strippers knows absolutely no bounds. Unfortunately though, it's pretty obvious that, when Shapiro gets back in the game, there's no way he's going to have the opportunity to hook his new pals up with VIP bottle service and private rooms at strip clubs because the NCAA is going to have their eyes ALL over him. But fear not, for he has a plan, and it's probably one of the more brilliant schemes in the entire scandalous booster repertoire.

Enter SMU's new $3 million locker room, half of it funded by two "undisclosed donors":

I must credit tweetster Adam Kramer for bringing this to my attention, but what he says is true - SMU's new locker room really DOES kind of look like a strip club. Sure, the pole is a little large, but hey, what man has the right to judge another man's preference on the surface area of their fleshly desires? But that tacky carpeting? The awkward lighting? All of those private booths with the dollar bill slots that eat twenties faster than Robert Griffin eats his words? And the LED lit Pony is just the absolute icing on the cake. Can't you see them turning off the lights, cranking up the fog machines and letting that twinkle while they usher the girls through the tunnel and the bubbly pops? To be honest, I'm not mad at all - I'm jealous that they found the loophole! Think about it - outside of certain specified times, no media or outside sources can be in the locker room snooping around, unless you're WWHD and you're hiding in a bathroom stall. So why not bring the stippers TO the athletes rather than the athletes to the strippers? It's nearly foolproof! Shapiro may be going away for a long time, but you can't say the man doesn't prioritize correctly.

And SMU is absolutely PERFECT for him! The Miami fanbase is as such - drug dealers and asshole northeastern transplants with money in their pockets and chips on their shoulders because they were beat up a lot as kids. Do I even need to draw the comparison to our penny loafer wearing, nose rubbing pals to the East? He'll fit right in!

Of course, based on his track record, if Yao Ming and his crew don't take care of Shapiro after the fact, he'll blow the whistle on them in the blink of an eye and possibly usher in another era of SMU Death Penaltyball. But strippers and hookers? In the locker room? I think it's a risk you have to be willing to take. Well played, Ponies. Well played. Welcome to the big leagues.

Frog Alumni Camp Report

-After only appearing briefly in the Jets' preseason opener, LaDainian Tomlinson is expected to play much more in exhibition #2, Sunday night against Cincinnati. That's right, it'll be LT and Kerley against Dalton and Bart Johnson.

-It looks as though Colin Jones is being groomed as a new leader for the 49ers' special teams. The club likes his versatility- even lining him up at WR some days in practice, and has him rooming with veteran and former special teams captain CJ Spillman.

-Malcolm Williams did not record a tackle in the Patriots' preseason game last night against Tampa Bay, which may not bode well in his battle to make the roster. That article mentions that the Pats like Marcus Cannon and are hopeful that he'll be cleared to play at some point, but doesn't mention Zach Roth.

-After starting 8 games over the past two years in St. Louis, Quincy Butler has been signed by New Orleans. He spent much of the 2008 season on the Saints' practice squad.

-The Browns' blog "Dawgs by Nature" projects Evan Frosch to be cut by the squad when final rosters are announced. Hope they are wrong!

Morning Dump