Not. Gonna. Happen.
...and they sure are butt hurt about it. For those who missed it, the MWC ruled that Boise can't wear their blue pants and blue jerseys at the same time during any MWC home games this year, meaning the tackiest jersey combination east of Oregon will cease to exist in college football. This came as somewhat of a shock to me, since the MWC and Craig Thompson have pretty much coddled Boise State since their entrance to the conference has been announced, and they have given the middle finger to TCU in most regards since their plans to leave were announced. I personally don't think this makes jack shit of a difference as to how the games are played, but it's great to see how up in arms all the potato farmers have gotten over the fact that they cant wear their blue on blue on a synthetic blue field which is painted exactly to match their jerseys. So, to all the Boise fans bitching and moaning about having to alter your wardrobe at home games, I say to you this- quit crying and get the fuck over it.
Look, your field is probably the tackiest, most amateur gimmick in all of college football. Actually, remove the word "probably" from that previous sentence, because nothing even comes close. Georgia has between the hedges, OU has that nerdy band leader sprint out hat routine (whatever the fuck you wanna call it), Ohio State dots the "i", Aggies play dress up and praise male cheerleaders. Lots of teams have their "thing" that is seen as tradition and even somewhat cool in some circles, but there's no tradition in a school having a fake blue field, especially when you've been D1, FBS, or whatever the hell it's called since the G.W. Bush administration. The fact that the MWC is letting you keep that bitch slap to the face of college athletics and not making you strip it and put in something that resembles grass should make you happy. Quit crying like children because you cant wear blue on blue on blue for conference home games. You already got a home game that shouldn't be yours, so it won't kill you to throw some white pants on or, God forbid, put on a potentially even tackier combination of highlighter orange on orange when TCU rolls to town in November.
Wear this. It's just as ugly, I promise.
Chris Petersen, who I've generally respected as a coach over the years, despite the miss-spelling of Peterson, had this to say on the topic-
“I thought it was ridiculous,” Petersen said. “… That’s our colors. That’s who we are. That’s who our fans have wanted us to be since I’ve been at Boise State. That’s what it’s been through and through.”
Funny you should say that, coach, because I'm pretty sure if grass could talk, it would echo the same sentiments about Boise State when they decided to lather some blue spray paint over a perfectly fine field turf. I imagine it would read something like this:
When asked what Grass thought about the synthetic blue surface Boise State has installed on the football field, Grass said "I thought it was ridiculous. Green is our color. That's who we are. That's what our fans have wanted since I've been on this Earth. That's what it's been through and through. Oh, and who or what the fuck is a Boise State?"
That's right, coach, before you get upset at the fact that we are making you change JERSEYS, remember that your school has decided to change GRASS. Also, plenty of Boise fans are now crying about how teams that wear green get to wear green on their green fields. Spoiler alert, dumb shits, grass is GREEN, so those teams that decided years ago to have green jerseys just gained themselves a competitive advantage. Also, I don't see any green teams designing their field turf to mimic their uniform colors. The only 2 teams in the world doing that are you and Eastern Washington and their bright red abomination field. Eastern Washington. You guys want to be uttered in the same breath as Eastern Washington? Shouldn't you be trying to get past that stigma as a gimmick program by now? You're so close.
If you're not ready to get rid of the blue field, let's start with baby steps. How about getting rid of the track around your field? There isn't much that screams FCS more than a track around your field. Well, except maybe a blue field. You're a big boy team now, so maybe your appearance should reflect that. I know I didn't wear "Football is Life, The Rest is Just Details" shirts, Umbro shorts, and black Nike socks to high school. I knew better, because I didn't want to look like a fucking idiot.
Consider what the MWC is doing to you to be a blessing. Just wear some hideous combination of blue and orange and go on beating nobodies at home until TCU shows up. Seriously, during this illustrious win streak, what home wins can you hang your hat on? Oregon? That's it. You'll have a chance to validate yourselves this year, so you better capitalize, because to an outsider that streak looks pretty unimpressive. Like I said, that field is no help, but playing a bunch of cupcakes is the real reason you don't lose there. I just hate the field because it's tacky and an offense to football and grass alike. They should've told you to rip up that eyesore and put in some real grass or green field turf and start acting like you belong. When you were an up and comer, flooding my ESPN weeknight games, I would adjust the picture on my TV every time I saw you because I thought, surely nobody is tacky enough to have a blue football field. I was wrong. Now grow up, get rid of it, and play football like the grown ups do.
I realized this started as a post about their incessant bitching of having to wear different jerseys on their home field, but let's face it: when discussing Boise, especially at home, the hate always turns back to how awful that field is. Maybe if their kicker had been staring down at green grass when practicing his kicks every day, it wouldn't have mind fucked him so hard when he looked down and saw green at Nevada.