Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Boise Can't Have Their Cake and Eat it Too...

Not. Gonna. Happen.

...and they sure are butt hurt about it. For those who missed it, the MWC ruled that Boise can't wear their blue pants and blue jerseys at the same time during any MWC home games this year, meaning the tackiest jersey combination east of Oregon will cease to exist in college football. This came as somewhat of a shock to me, since the MWC and Craig Thompson have pretty much coddled Boise State since their entrance to the conference has been announced, and they have given the middle finger to TCU in most regards since their plans to leave were announced. I personally don't think this makes jack shit of a difference as to how the games are played, but it's great to see how up in arms all the potato farmers have gotten over the fact that they cant wear their blue on blue on a synthetic blue field which is painted exactly to match their jerseys. So, to all the Boise fans bitching and moaning about having to alter your wardrobe at home games, I say to you this- quit crying and get the fuck over it.

Look, your field is probably the tackiest, most amateur gimmick in all of college football. Actually, remove the word "probably" from that previous sentence, because nothing even comes close. Georgia has between the hedges, OU has that nerdy band leader sprint out hat routine (whatever the fuck you wanna call it), Ohio State dots the "i", Aggies play dress up and praise male cheerleaders. Lots of teams have their "thing" that is seen as tradition and even somewhat cool in some circles, but there's no tradition in a school having a fake blue field, especially when you've been D1, FBS, or whatever the hell it's called since the G.W. Bush administration. The fact that the MWC is letting you keep that bitch slap to the face of college athletics and not making you strip it and put in something that resembles grass should make you happy. Quit crying like children because you cant wear blue on blue on blue for conference home games. You already got a home game that shouldn't be yours, so it won't kill you to throw some white pants on or, God forbid, put on a potentially even tackier combination of highlighter orange on orange when TCU rolls to town in November.

Wear this. It's just as ugly, I promise.

Chris Petersen, who I've generally respected as a coach over the years, despite the miss-spelling of Peterson, had this to say on the topic-

“I thought it was ridiculous,” Petersen said. “… That’s our colors. That’s who we are. That’s who our fans have wanted us to be since I’ve been at Boise State. That’s what it’s been through and through.”

Funny you should say that, coach, because I'm pretty sure if grass could talk, it would echo the same sentiments about Boise State when they decided to lather some blue spray paint over a perfectly fine field turf. I imagine it would read something like this:

When asked what Grass thought about the synthetic blue surface Boise State has installed on the football field, Grass said "I thought it was ridiculous. Green is our color. That's who we are. That's what our fans have wanted since I've been on this Earth. That's what it's been through and through. Oh, and who or what the fuck is a Boise State?"

That's right, coach, before you get upset at the fact that we are making you change JERSEYS, remember that your school has decided to change GRASS. Also, plenty of Boise fans are now crying about how teams that wear green get to wear green on their green fields. Spoiler alert, dumb shits, grass is GREEN, so those teams that decided years ago to have green jerseys just gained themselves a competitive advantage. Also, I don't see any green teams designing their field turf to mimic their uniform colors. The only 2 teams in the world doing that are you and Eastern Washington and their bright red abomination field. Eastern Washington. You guys want to be uttered in the same breath as Eastern Washington? Shouldn't you be trying to get past that stigma as a gimmick program by now? You're so close.

If you're not ready to get rid of the blue field, let's start with baby steps. How about getting rid of the track around your field? There isn't much that screams FCS more than a track around your field. Well, except maybe a blue field. You're a big boy team now, so maybe your appearance should reflect that. I know I didn't wear "Football is Life, The Rest is Just Details" shirts, Umbro shorts, and black Nike socks to high school. I knew better, because I didn't want to look like a fucking idiot.

Consider what the MWC is doing to you to be a blessing. Just wear some hideous combination of blue and orange and go on beating nobodies at home until TCU shows up. Seriously, during this illustrious win streak, what home wins can you hang your hat on? Oregon? That's it. You'll have a chance to validate yourselves this year, so you better capitalize, because to an outsider that streak looks pretty unimpressive. Like I said, that field is no help, but playing a bunch of cupcakes is the real reason you don't lose there. I just hate the field because it's tacky and an offense to football and grass alike. They should've told you to rip up that eyesore and put in some real grass or green field turf and start acting like you belong. When you were an up and comer, flooding my ESPN weeknight games, I would adjust the picture on my TV every time I saw you because I thought, surely nobody is tacky enough to have a blue football field. I was wrong. Now grow up, get rid of it, and play football like the grown ups do.

I realized this started as a post about their incessant bitching of having to wear different jerseys on their home field, but let's face it: when discussing Boise, especially at home, the hate always turns back to how awful that field is. Maybe if their kicker had been staring down at green grass when practicing his kicks every day, it wouldn't have mind fucked him so hard when he looked down and saw green at Nevada.

36 comments:

Lyle Lanley said...

If they want the MWC to reverse this decision that they see as petty and childish...maybe the leauge should review it's decision to move the BSU-TCU game to Boise...

mc.hammertime said...

harsh words, from a team that wears purple and shiny pants...inferiority complex much?

CounselorFrog said...

last time i checked our field wasn't purple and shiny. there is a little bit of a difference.

shortnkerley's said...

Sorry Nike wants to trick us out in awesome new jerseys every time we play. Are you making fun of the color purple? What a 5th grade insult that is.

Rabble Rouser said...

And thus began the plague of smurfs, you happy now SnK?

As far as having an inferiority complex goes I have just 3 words for you mc.hammerpants, ROSE. BOWL. CHAMPS.

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Rabble Rouser said...

Two more words. KYLE. BROTZMAN.

Rabble Rouser said...

"Comment deleted" Way to stick to your guns spud thumper.

Unknown said...

About as 5th grade as making fun of blue for looking stupid, and also saying orange looks stupid...never mind the fact that Nike must like us better because they've never let Lady Gaga influence their procombats for BSU. and on the rose bowl-that still isn't enough to heal the wound caused by our victory over you? Get over it. It'll keep happening.

Unknown said...

really? You'd like to compare your kicker's career stats to Brotzman's? Be my guest.

Unknown said...

as for the comment delete, even your sports blog fails next to BSU's. not used to the crappy format or the fact that it can't recognize a repeat offender's name

shortnkerley's said...

Get over the Rose Bowl? I don't understand. Also, I didn't make fun of blue. I made fun of blue turf being a substitute for grass. Anyone with reading comprehension skills would've gotten that.

I like that you think we still dwell on the Fiesta Bowl. That's not the case. The Rose Bowl healed those wounds. However, I can tell by your inability to let go of your Brotzman choke job last season, the incessant butt-hurtness of your fan base about not getting to wear blue, and your trolling around on TCU blogs in July that you clearly are the one who is upset.

Rabble Rouser- I'm thrilled now. Just drawing in the traffic, one hate rant at a time.

Rabble Rouser said...

You tater zoobs sure are cute when you're angry. Run along now and we'll revisit this in November.

shortnkerley's said...

Compare career stats all you want. He actually choked two against Utah that MAY have gotten us to a BCS game. We get it. I'm sure you can back me stat-wise on how much better Brotzman is, but fact of the matter is our kicker never directly kicked away a Rose Bowl bid from inside 30 yards...twice.

Oh, and he's not fully equipped with CZ earrings and a chinstrap beard either.

Rabble Rouser said...

@SnK I figured as much, call it the Colin Cowherd approach to blogging. I can respect that but Boise fans are just so damn annoying. They are like the fans of Baylor, Tech, TAMU, & A&M all rolled into one.

Unknown said...

you're going to nitpick a chinstrap beard over a tin foil luchador mask? And I saw this for BOISE STATE being in it. Clearly you just can't let go! You have to talk about my school on your blog! Why so much hate and swearing and retarded 'insults' about a team that doesn't matter? You don't see Air Force posting about it. Or even San Diego, and it's their fault it happened.

Rabble Rouser said...

LMAO. Yes CZ's and bad facial hair seem to come standard at Boise when you sign your LOI. Just ask for "the Zabransky"

Rabble Rouser said...

AFA & SDSU have a blog? That's news to me. Link?

shortnkerley's said...

You're the one still here on our blog, so who's the one who can't let go? As for the tin foil mask- he hasn't cost us a BCS appearance single-handedly, so i'll give him a pass for now. Now go on, those potatoes aren't gonna peel themselves...

Unknown said...

http://gazetteafasports.freedomblogging.com/ and san diego is on fanblogs.com

Unknown said...

I haven't been here much longer than it took that loser to write such an exhaustingly long, worthless epistle. At least I've got reason, being hit by a drunk driver (I assume he was a TCU alumni) and homebound. Face it, you've got a team crush on us and it infuriates you

Rabble Rouser said...

Ummm... Fanblogs doesn't have a MWC relevant post since December 7th 2010 and the AFA blog is run by the local newspaper reporter. Nice try though.

shortnkerley's said...

The fact that you know their blog addresses is further proof that you have nothing better to do but troll around on other blogs looking for a reason to get your panties in a mess. Thanks for proving my point bud.

Rabble Rouser said...

Hey! We pride ourselves on our ability to drink and drive safely, we are Texans after all.

Unknown said...

Dude, I'm stuck at home anyways! I can't even use my left leg right now. That makes it all the more pathetic that someone like you keeps straggling to fuel my fire. How do YOU not have anything better to do?

shortnkerley's said...

You're at home because you got hit by a drunk driver, that you automatically assume is a TCU alum despite the very small living alumni base we have? That's too bad. As far as the whole "crush" comment goes- once again, man, you're the one here on our blog trying to get into it with us. Looks like your views are distorted. Get that head checked out. That drunk driver must've really messed your brain up.

Rabble Rouser said...

The drunk driver couldn't have messed his brain up any worse than his Boise Junior College education already did. Run along now Spud Thumper.

shortnkerley's said...

You make a good point. I'll walk away from this argument (get it?) and get back to work. Good luck with the whole personal vendetta against TCU and assuming we are all dangerous drunk drivers trying to tag you with our cars.

Wendy Peffercorn said...

Wait... I only got your leg? Damnit, I missed.

Unknown said...

...and they can't even take a good joke. Just disappointed. And here I was, thinking "y'all" were great fun from the samplings TCU gave us on obnug. The inflammatory article (nay, novella) did not disappoint, though. Carry on. We'll see you on the beautiful in-your-face blue.

Unknown said...

PS I am ecstatic to see Kellen's home numbers this season. He'll be able to see his targets finally!

Rabble Rouser said...

I am ecstatic to watch you guys on TV now withour needed a bottle of advil and a glass of whiskey.

P.S. Nobody here said that the blue on blue gives an unfair advantage or causes the players to blend in to the turf. On that it is tacky, ugly, and an eyesore.

P.P.S. I thought you were leaving?

shortnkerley's said...

You forget this guy's reading comprehension skills are flawed. He got drunk last night and got hit by a car. Remember? He told us that.

LOLfolding said...

u mad bro?

Ice Frog 86 said...

As a Frog from 86 I want to thank Boise State for one thing. They earned the climb up like TCU. I am not really into the color of the field but the character of their coach and kids. They have it on the line every game unlike the none A.Q. schools. I just want to hire the salesman that sold them on the idea of blue grass.

HFrog77 said...

I am SOOO glad I'm going to the Boise game! Can't wait to get up there and witness the end of their streak. And the continuation of ours...