Thursday, June 23, 2011

Erik Miller Signs with Cincinnati

Buh-bye

Junior starting pitcher/relief disaster Erik Miller will be taking his, ahem, "talents" to Cincinnati, or at least some low level crappy minor league affiliate. Looks like we will no longer have to see that raunchy porn stache on the mound in Fort Worth anymore. Obviously this isn't an underclassmen we are too concerned with, but best of luck to Erik in the future. Word of advice- learn how to get out lefties and maybe work on your warm-up routine if you're going to be a reliever. I can't speak for everyone, but I wont miss you too much. Here is the link.

35 comments:

It'sMillerTime said...

In the newest edition of Sour Grapes: 21 year old, Erik Miller, makes more with one contract signature than shortnkerley's makes in a year.

shortnkerley's said...

Maybe, but I don't know how big those 31st round signing bonuses are these days. Pretty awesome that you know how much I make annually though. You seem to be missing the point- good luck going forward, but I'm definitely not going to miss the guy who was responsible for more than 1/3 of the team's losses this year.

Lyle Lanley said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
VikingFrog said...

I will miss his Captain Morgan facial hair.

Here's to hoping he succeeds in the pros.

I wish I made more annually... sigh.

RJHiggins12 said...

How could you not love that stache'? I thought it was pretty funny.

And it's kind of unfair to hold him responsible for losing "1/3" of our games. I mean, I think it was Winkler who had a loss even though he only gave up 2 runs. Yeah, he took the loss. But it wasn't his fault. None of our pitches, even Miller, ever got that much help from our bats.

It'sMillerTime said...

shortnkerley's, I was obviously kidding when I posted that he made more in his signing bonus than you make in a year-- I don't know what his signing bonus is, and I don't know how much you make annually. I was merely commenting on the fact that you (and spitblood) really dislike Miller, hence why I made my handle "It'sMillerTime."

I do understand that he had more than 1/3 of our losses, but I don't think he was a bad pitcher or the reason for our underachieving season. I would blame a lot on our timely hitting (or lack thereof), but if you want to blame pitching, we could just as easily have blamed Purke.

Hypothetically, if Purke hadn't have taken off last summer and fall, maybe he doesn't hurt his arm this season. If a porn star takes time off between "appearances," his "tool" may not last as long in his next "outing." (And no, I'm not blaming Purke for our underachieving season either)

And while we're on the topic of porn, Miller's porn stache was the shit. In fact, he pitched better in the 2nd half of the season after he grew the stache back (minus the ORU outing).

Here's to hoping that Purke throwing in the Cape League keeps him fresh and he returns to TCU better than he was freshman year. With a few hopeful returns (Purke, Winkler, Featherston, and Coates) and a few high schoolers coming to TCU instead of signing (Crick and Cron), along with the return of Mitchell and the rest of the starters, I'd say we'll be back in Omaha a year from now. That's a lot of if's though...

shortnkerley's said...

Never said I didn't like the porn stache, just said it was raunchy, which it is. However, stuff like that should be reserved for people who produce, like how Dalton rocked a mohawk for a game last year, or Matt Purke's whole entire look.

A lot went wrong with this years team and injuries were the main issue. Injuries, lack of timely hitting, and of course, trying to make Erik Miller a closer. Let's hope we catch breaks next season and make another run to Omaha.

Lyle Lanley said...

Miller certainly had some downs this year, but he also did win 7 games for this team and logged a lot of innings for a staff that was undermanned virtually the entire season.

Best of luck to him at the next level!

BuckNasty said...

Kerley's is such a prick. Be nice.

Slay Purple said...

Compliment Sandwich: Great Mustache-Terrible Reliever-Solid Starter

Tanner said...

stache was horrendous. pitching was horrendous. but also put in lots of bad situations. good luck, but good riddance.

saltyyy vet said...

great stache and he got 6 figures for all you haters that are wondering

saltyyy vet said...

great stache and he got 6 figures for all you haters that were wondering

Rotten Arsenal said...

I still like Pornstacio, I don't care what anybody sez.

italianstallion03 said...

Hey shortnkerley's.. just curious buddy- how much baseball have you played? Better yet, what's the highest level of baseball you've played?.... I'm assuming by your complete lack of respect for the game and its players as well as your total ignorance to the situation (as you so passionately expressed through your blogs) that you never made it passed high school baseball, if you even made it that far. Not to mention, be considered good enough to be drafted by a Major League Club. If I had to guess, you fall somewhere amongst the 95% or so that just didn't have what it takes to play division I baseball, you know the mediocre bunch that maybe got a varsity letter, probably bought some friends when they joined a frat, and may or may not had gone on to get a college degree. Its just a guess though so don't get too upset. You see, it's blatantly obvious that your knowledge of the game, in large part, stems from statistics; you're what baseball refers to as a "stat-rat". Which is fine- ignorance is bliss. However, in the real baseball world (and I say real because ESPN, MLB Network, blog sites, and any and all other outlets that you get your biased information from, aren't real) statistics are NOT the deciding factor in who signs and who doesn't.

For example, say you get one collegiate at bat and say you hit a little dinker down the thirdbase line, that of which is hit too softly for the thirdbaseman to make a play. So what, you're happy with it because it's a line drive up the middle in the books. Hooray!!! Now, you end the season with a 1.000 batting average, and that's the highest on the team, hell, that might even be the highest average in DI baseball history! Would it make sense for the Reds to draft you?..... How about another example. If you're a true Frog baseball fan, then you remember Austin Adams. He led the Frogs in just about every hitting category his junior and senior years. He had the size, the arm, and the bat for the big leagues, however, didn't even get sniffed by Major League Baseball.. neither did Taylor Craigin or Trent Appleby- two pitchers who statistically, out-performed Erik and couldn't have pitched better in their 4 years at TCU. Why do you think that is Mr. shortnkerley's?..... Don't worry.. I don't expect you to have an answer. It's simply too far out of your particular area of expertise.

Your blogs are pathetic, inconsiderate, and childish. It says a lot about Erik's character to not respond to those who bash him in blogs. It might give you a little insight as to why he's where he is and well, why you're talking shit about him on the fucking internet. I mean I can't even believe that I stooped this low, but I just couldn't let this one slide. It's really kind of sad that you call yourself a fan. Oh and by the way, no one who matters gives two shits that "you're not going to miss Erik Miller." The fact of the matter is, Erik Miller is much bigger than you'll ever be. To help you understand this, when exactly was the last time people payed enough attention to you and your career to blog about it or even care enough to voice their feelings toward you at all?

So where should you go from here? Two basic things: 1. If you plan on talking shit about someone behind their back on an internet blog, you should ask yourself, "Do I honestly have the balls or the credentials to tell this person how I really feel to their face?" If you're like most egotistical chickenshits, you'll just blow right through this step and proceed. But before you do, know this: 2. You have absolutely no fucking room to say anything negative about anyone or anything they've done until you've been in their shoes and gone through the things they've gone through. Just some things to consider for your future blogs.

saltyyy vet said...

I agree completely with what italianstallion03 has posted

saltyyy vet said...

I couldn't had said it better myself...

THEFINCH said...

isn't it football season?? i don't doubt that miller is talented and has "been through alot", like having his college paid in full for throwing a ball, but there is no denying he sucked this year, not always, but somewhat often and in a big way. deal with it jersey shore

Jack Burton said...

"Your blogs are pathetic, inconsiderate, and childish" ...duh.

italianstallion03 = Erik Miller? haha unreal

shortnkerley's said...

Really dug into the archives for this one.

Thanks for reading our blog and your opinions and constructive criticism are always greatly appreciated. Go Frogs!!!

Sir Wesley Willis said...

Bill Simmons sez, "Yup, there are our readers"

Rotten Arsenal said...

Erik posted the link on his Facebook page... the comments are hilarious!

shortnkerley's said...

Maybe he and everyone else should get over it. He's gone now, it was said months ago following a disappointing baseball season. Best of luck in the future and move on with your life. It's football season. Erik Miller is the least of mine or most of TCU's concerns right now.

italianstallion03 said...

Good point

BuckNasty said...

Ha. He posted it on FB? What a loser.

Dave Schlossnagle said...

The fact of the matter is, Erik Miller is much bigger than you'll ever be. To help you understand this, when exactly was the last time people payed enough attention to you and your career to blog about it or even care enough to voice their feelings toward you at all?

ItalianStallion03, you do realize that is pretty much exactly what you just did right?

THEFINCH said...

People blog and voice their opinion about Spitblood everyday. That, and my dad owns a car dealership. THEFINCH -1, Schloss - 0, E Mills - (1)

shortnkerley's said...

"when exactly was the last time people payed enough attention to you and your career to blog about it or even care enough to voice their feelings toward you at all?"

Um, didn't you just care to blog and voice your feelings about what I wrote? Didn't really think that one through there, did ya bud?

Once again, it's football season. Get the fuck over it.

Dave Schlossnagle said...

Shortnkerley.. Thank you for clarifying my previous comment by repeating it using different words.

shortnkerley's said...

Really??? Because it was a simple cut and paste of the exact words you said. You're not...you're not smart, are you?

Dave Schlossnagle said...

"when exactly was the last time people payed enough attention to you and your career to blog about it or even care enough to voice their feelings toward you at all?"

-This is "a simple cut and paste" from a portion of ItalianStallion's incoherent rant which I used in my comment (below) to highlight the irony in his statement.

My Comment:
"ItalianStallion03, you do realize that is pretty much exactly what you just did right?"

Your Comment:
Um, didn't you just care to blog and voice your feelings about what I wrote? Didn't really think that one through there, did ya bud?



Awfully similar to my point...

Dave Schlossnagle said...

Bud

shortnkerley's said...

Got it. My bad. I'm officially done with this thread. Erik Miller is long gone and I wont care about college baseball until late February.

Dave Schlossnagle said...

If I were you I would be officially done with this thread too. I'll admit this has gone on way too long; however, at the end of the day, I think we can still take a few things from this discussion. Mainly, the fact that:
A.) You're a douche, AND
B.) You are drastically overestimating your intelligence.

So next time, before you click to publish your newest "clever" insult, take a second and ask yourself, "Is it possible that I'm actually the stupid one?"

I am officially done with this thread.

D said...

who is Erik Miller?