Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Lessons in SMU Hate - Window Wang.

When you're a TCU alum, a big car CAN equal a big penis.

First off, for the ten to twelve readers who have stuck with us during the presumed SpitBlood “off season,” I want to apologize for the lack of recruiting intro updates this week. My company decided that instead of taking us all to Vegas and staging a two day hangover disguised as a mock conference, we’d still have the conference, except this time it’d be via webcast. If there’s more of a gut-punch than sitting in on a heavy duty truck finance industry conference in front of your computer instead of in Vegas, then I invite you to share. Anyway, I fully plan on finishing up the class recap throughout the next couple of weeks while it still remains relevant, but in the meantime, I thought I’d share another lesson in SMU hate.

Here’s the situation: I go to a gym right near my house, and the gym just so happens to be right across the highway from SMU; in fact, If you look out the window immediately after exiting the elevator, you can overlook the entire campus. So, naturally you get a lot of riff raff of that sort patronizing the place. And last night, after leaving said gym, I walk out to my car to find THAT on my car – and if you can’t tell what THAT is from the unclear picture, just pull down your pants and imagine you’re not looking at a scared turtle from the current sub-freezing temperatures.

My first reaction was, “Haha, I get it, my car is dirty and someone thought it’d be funny to draw a big D on my car. You sure got me!” Then I noticed where it was located – right above my TCU Alumni sticker. Then I remembered that I live in Dallas in the SMU area. Then I noticed the intricate, veiny detail of said phallus which, even though I own one myself, I still couldn’t tell you what kind of topography it has. This made me jump to another conclusion – obviously the person who drew this on my car must have a more “intimate” knowledge of the male genitalia. Of course, the first person you think would have said knowledge would be a girl, right? However, how many non-drunk girls – and I say this because surely no one is capable of working out when they’re ‘drawing a dick on someone’s car’ drunk – do you know who would do such a thing?

Moving along, having already grasped that this was surely an SMU student or alumnus, I flashed back to a story about a certain ex-SMU quarterback who was rumored to have been infected by the gay – or maybe he beat up someone infected by the gay who was stalking him, I honestly can’t remember – and knew this quarterback must be the culprit. Think about it – given he’s an athlete, he probably still works out, and since this place is right near SMU, it’s a natural fit. Also, since's not playing in the NFL, he obviously must have a job, which would mean he couldn't go to the gym until after work. And even though he no longer plays for the Ponies, and he actually left in a bit of a huff I believe, given we beat him each time we faced him, he must still have enough TCU hate in his system to deface my automobile with his dude on dude pornography. While most athletes view the all-male locker room prison shower situation as a by-product of the job, it would appear that at SMU, this is probably the best part of playing the game. I mean, have you ever seen Bo Levi Mitchell? Kid looks like a gay Eminem - redundant. And he’s not even the quarterback I’m referencing above! June Jones certainly has a type.

So, where am I trying to go with this? This isn’t some homophobic rant, nor is this me saying that we should go out and temporarily deface the cars of any SMU alumni we see (although I’m not NOT saying that). This isn’t even me saying that I’m mad I had to drive home with a big, throbbing wang drawn on the back of my car. I’m just pissed off that the person who drew a dick on my car went to SMU.

And that’s today’s lesson in SMU Hate.

Big Game Tonight

A few weeks ago, I got some flack for a post about the basketball team in which I expressed a bit of optimism about the program. So before you dismiss everything I'm going to write about tonight's game against Utah, don't think that I am going to frame this game between two sub-.500 teams as a make or break game, or that with a win the Frogs might somehow be magically catapulted into postseason glory.

But what this team needs is confidence, and a strong finish to the season (along with what we hope will be solid recruiting) would really help build that for the 2010-'11 season. And a strong finish to the season starts tonight at home against Utah. While the Utes are historically one of the stronger basketball programs in the MWC, they are struggling this year and are a very beatable squad. Believe it or not, Vegas actually has this game as a pick'em, and the Frogs have a slightly better RPI. A win tonight would put the Frogs ahead of the Utes in the standings, and would give them a better shot at avoiding BYU, UNLV or New Mexico in the first round of the conference tournament.

Elsewhere...those "Basketball Big 3" are looking good in this week's bracketology, where BYU and New Mexico are both 4-seeds and UNLV a 7. Other Texas teams included this week are UT (3), A&M (7), Baylor (8), UTEP (12) and Sam Houston (15). And don't look now, but the Lady Frogs are in first place at 17-5 overall, ranked 24th in the country and a projected 6-seed in the latest women's bracketology.

Non AQ Pre-Spring Power Rankings

I know this shit doesn't really matter right now, but its something else for us to discuss. Oh and by the way, F Donkey State.

It’s time for everyone’s favorite: pre-spring rankings. Now, we had some communication issues with these rankings last year, so I’m going to explain how these rankings are done. These rankings are based on if the season started tomorrow.

These are NOT my preseason rankings.

There are several teams that have a lot of returners and fewer questions to answer. There are other teams that have talent, but are still looking for some key pieces. This is a reflection of how those teams stack up. Again, these are NOT my preseason rankings.

1. Boise State: The only loss bigger than cornerback Kyle Wilson is the loss of defensive coordinator Justin Wilcox. The Broncos did make a quick hire from within to keep up the continuity, which should help with the transition into spring football. The offense is totally intact and this team should be working on refining the good thing it already has going.

2. TCU: The Horned Frogs proved last year that they don’t rebuild, they reload. They lost a lot of defensive players that were supposed to hamper the team this year, but actually did little to slow it down. Even though TCU loses defensive stars Jerry Hughes and Daryl Washington, there are quality guys waiting and TCU should be able to pick up right where it left off.

3. Utah: The Utes had a huge signing day, especially nabbing some key junior college players who will be able to come in and help right away. Jordan Wynn is the undisputed starting quarterback, which should make this spring a lot more productive than the last one. The defense has a few question marks, but has several players that can step in seamlessly.

4. SMU: Coach June Jones likes working with young players and he’ll have a whole host of them this spring. However, unlike last year, Jones has a quality season on which to build and a lot of young experience with which to build it. The quarterback battle should be interesting with Kyle Padron, Bo Levi Mitchell, and even New Mexico State transfer J.J. McDermott, and they need to find a new starting running back, but overall this team should be looking toward a nine or 10-win season.

5. Navy: Quarterback Ricky Dobbs will likely miss the spring as he recovers from knee surgery, which might not be a bad thing for the Midshipmen. Dobbs was their primary source of scoring last season, and the spring will force the Mids to find other players to become offensive weapons. This Navy teams doesn’t lose much and should continue to be a tough group.

6. Air Force: Coach Troy Calhoun flirted with Tennessee and defensive coordinator Tim DeRuyter is gone, but many of the players from last season's young team return. Losing DeRuyter is a huge hit since the defense was the anchor of the team, but with former co-defensive coordinator Matt Wallerstedt assuming fulltime coordinator duties, it should be an easy transition this spring.

7. Houston: The Cougars need to spend this spring working on the defense, which should be a transition with new defensive coordinator Brian Stewart. Luckily for Stewart, he’s got a young and talented group with which to work, it just needs some direction. Offensively, the Cougars should be roughly the same despite a new offensive coordinator and quarterbacks coach. Both have been in the program, and they return almost all of their offensive players.

8. BYU: Why are the Cougars so low? It’s not because I hate BYU (though some of you will dispute that), it’s because the Cougars have a lot of key questions to answer this spring. The most pressing is at quarterback, but offensive production is also going to be a question mark. Tight end was the most productive position on the team last season, and both of the top players at that position are gone. The Cougars have to find a go-to receiver and replace all of their starters on the defensive line and in the linebacking corps. There is a lot of talent that played last season returning, though, and several missionaries coming in.

9. Middle Tennessee: Middle Tennessee returns most of its players from last season, but lost both of its coordinators. The only reason Middle Tennessee is on this list is because it broke in a new offensive coordinator in 2009 and won 10 games. The talent is still there. Quarterback Dwight Dasher returns and most of the defense remains intact. There are a couple holes to fill, but nothing that should stop this team from being as good as it was a year ago.

10. Nevada: The Wolf Pack didn’t end the season on a high note, but they return a good portion of the team that rattled off an eight game winning streak after losing their first three. Quarterback Colin Kaepernick is back and the running game is deep even without Vai Taua participating in spring ball. The defense is the weak spot on this team, but with defensive coordinator Andy Buh coming over from Stanford, the Wolf Pack should start to show some improvement.

Future Frogs all over All-State Teams

The TSWA All-State Teams have been released, and Patterson's most recent recruiting class was prevalent amongst those honored:

-Matt Brown, 1st Team Quarterback
-Kevin White, 1st Team Defensive Back
-Elisha Olabode, 2nd Team Defensive Back & Kick Returner
-Blake Roberts, 3rd Team Linebacker
-Travaras Battle-Smith, 3rd Team Kick Returner

-David Johnson, 1st Team Defensive Line

-Stephen Bryant, 2nd Team Defensive Back

Also, Cameron White, the 6'2", 180lb wide receiver from Arlington Bowie who was the first commitment for the Class of 2011, was on the 2nd Team Offense in 5A.

More Pac-10 Expansion Talk

I know this isn't Horn Frog info, but seeing as how teams from the MWC could be leaving the conference, this could affect the Frogs.

From ESPN College Football Blog:

Debating Pac-10 expansion is no longer idle chit-chat. Pac-10 commissioner Larry Scott made that clear during a teleconference with reporters Tuesday.

"It really is over the next six to 12 months that we'll start having serious analysis and serious conversations," Scott said about potential expansion.

Scott was joined on the conference call by Kevin Weiberg, his new right-hand man. Weiberg, the former Big 12 commissioner and Big Ten executive, was named deputy commissioner and chief operating officer this week.

Scott said he spent the first six months of his tenure listening to administrators throughout the conference. Now he's turning his focus toward action.

"The announcement of Kevin is really the start of changes and repositioning you'll see for the conference over the next 12 to 18 months," he said.

That time period is vital because the conference's TV and media contracts expire after the 2011-12 academic year. The conference needs a significant upgrade in revenue if it is going to keep up with the other BCS conferences, particularly the SEC and Big Ten.

And expansion could make the conference more alluring during negotiations.

"It makes sense [to consider expansion], if you are going to do it, to do it when you can monetize it and get value for it commercially," Scott said.

It also appears that some sort of Pac-10 network -- it could be a partnership with another BCS conference -- will get serious consideration. Scott said Weiberg's experience building the Big Ten network was "very significant."

"A network is absolutely one of the solutions we will look at," Scott said.

Scott said there have been no serious discussions with any potential candidates if the Pac-10 were to expand. He only said he'd noticed an increased "curiosity" about expansion among conference members, which was, in part, inspired by the Big Ten announcing it was looking into expansion.

Still, it's fair to say a subject of seemingly endless debate -- expansion -- might be resolved within the next year.