Boise State QB Coach Rico Dynamite is apparently worth ever penny.
After waking up Saturday morning to check the box score - yes, I went to bed before the game was over. I am old - and seeing Boise 51, Fresno State 0, I had to face some facts. One, Boise is good. Two, Boise's defense is maybe better than their offense. And three, Boise is definitely going to be seen as being superior to TCU in the minds of every voter not living in Tarrant County. I knew this game was going to be dangerous for us - despite having a worse record than San Diego State did when they rolled into Fort Worth, for whatever reason the pundits were up in arms about this being a tough game for the Broncos, so no matter what happened they were going to inflate the result accordingly. I think we all expected Boise to win by a pretty nice margin, but 51-0 just made my stomach churn because I knew what the backlash would be. Just like the media overreacted to TCU going to sleep on a good San Diego State team - who led Utah all game Saturday but lost on a blocked punt - they praised Boise for beating up on a middle of the pack WAC opponent. I understand that beating anyone 51-0 is a big deal, but is it any more impressive than what TCU did against Baylor, Air Force, Utah or any opponent on our schedule not hailing from the state's of Oregon or San Diego, which is apparently the 51st state now? I give them all the credit in the world for taking care of business against an inferior team, which we clearly did not do against the Aztecs, but let's not act like they shut down the Greatest Show on Turf era Rams or anything.
Sure, I was pleasantly surprised to see that, despite our off week, Boise still lags behind us in the BCS rankings, but the gap was significantly narrowed and, just like they said last week, the media is "GUARANTEEING" that Boise will jump TCU with a win over Nevada, even if the Frogs come out and put a bloody exclamation mark on Mike Locksley's career as a college head coach. I definitely take their guarantees with a grain of salt, but if TCU and Boise both win by large margins, the voters are going to be clamoring over each to get their ballots in the inbox of the powers that be with Boise at the top, and I'm not sure how many more favors the computers can do us going forward.
So what are we to do? What can we really hope to happen this week that will take Boise out of the equation? Well, the best case scenario is for the ESPN studios to get shut down all week due to an ebola outbreak, thus killing off any Boise hype until it is contained, not to mention the Herbstreit's of the world, which would confuse the hell out of voters because they'd have to think for themselves and thus would just keep the status quo out of necessity. The second, of course, is for Boise to lose in Reno Friday evening, but unless you're the most cynical member of the anti-Boise fan club, you can't possibly expect that to happen. In fact, I don't think you can even hope for a close game with the way Boise is playing right now. But there is one thing you can hope for, one thing that, while it'll make you feel ugly inside and earn the ire of any unbiased bystander, would give the Wolfpack a fighting chance to take out the Broncos and overturn the WAC pecking order in the last year of it's current configuration.
Yep, TCU fans, the time has come for us to wish a game altering injury on Kellen Moore.
Before the moralists among us shout me down for calling for the downfall of a student athlete who by all means seems like a pretty good kid, let me clarify. I don't want Kellen Moore to have a career ending injury. Heck, I don't want him to have an injury that effects him beyond the game Friday. I would love for the guy to come back next week, blast Utah state, and then return next year and make the TCU/Boise game the most hyped ever in the Mountain West Conference. I just don't want him to play Friday night. Perhaps a tweaked ankle, or a little turf toe, I don't care. Or not even that - just one of those nagging injuries you hear about that shouldn't be enough to keep you down, but are persistent enough that you can't play your A game. Or food poisoning. Just SOMETHING that either keeps him on the sidelines or, if he does play, keeps him from playing his best, slows the game down a little and gives Nevada a chance to keep up. Is that so wrong? Ok, don't answer that....
To be honest, even if Kellen Moore doesn't play, Boise's defense and offensive play makers not named Kellen Moore are probably good enough to sneak by Nevada. And that's really what I'm hoping for - a slim Boise win, followed by a TCU blowout, which, if anything is right in the world, will create just enough doubt in the minds of voters to keep us elevated above the Broncos. If Cam Newton was suspended and Auburn struggled, you bet your ass they'd downgrade the Tigers because they clearly wouldn't be the same team without him, so why not do the same to the Broncos without Kellen Moore? This has nothing to do with Boise State personally; I could definitely argue that they are the best team in the country - better than TCU, even - and I wish them as much success as any team in the country that doesn't sport a Horned Frog as a mascot. But when this success comes at our expense, actions must be taken. These guys scare me and I want them out of the picture. It's not you Boise, it's me.
So, for your viewing pleasure, here is a collection of the worst sports related injuries I could find on the interwebs that will hopefully generate some bad mojo in the greater Boise area this week. Desperate times require desperate measures.
And, of course, the most famous one of all, with which we never would've been able to witness Sandra Bullock pulling off some of the most abrasive accent work since Caddyshack...