Friday, September 17, 2010

...So This Happened.

Is that Bill Shakespeare in Waco?

So just when you thought that Baylor fans couldn't get any worse, and when you thought that Tech's "Silent Out" motivation tool for this weekend was as bad as it gets, I direct you to what came across my inbox this afternoon.

‘Twas the week of the game, and at each TCU house
The Frog fans were boasting, and running their mouths
A socking they knew they would give to the Bears
Worrying about Baylor was the least of their cares

At night, they slept soundly, all tucked in their beds
While visions of BCS Title Games danced in their heads
The Frog fans figured that from the very first snap
The Bears would play like they were in a long winter’s nap

But down I-35 there arose some new chatter
The Bears were no longer just meat on a platter
To a 2-0 start they had raced in a flash
With a balanced attack of the run and the pass

As kickoff approached TCU fans were aglow
No way the winds of change would now blow
But what to the wondering eyes did appear
But a Baylor QB, with feet as fast as reindeer

He ran the offense well, so lively and quick
The Frog fans realized that this Griffin was slick
More rapid than eagles, the Baylor scoring drives came
And Horned Frogs soon learned all these Bears’ names

Now Griffin! Now Finley! Now Williams! Now Wright!
On Salubi! On Johnson! This will be our night!
To the end zone we go, we don’t punt the ball
Now dash away Griffin, they can’t catch you at all!

The Horned Frogs sat stunned, their eyes weren’t dry
But instead of blood squirting, it was tears that they cried
Around the stadium, the “Sic ‘Em” chant grew
Could the Bears win, could this really be true?

We all had an inkling this might be too good
And the Baylor fans danced, as we now legally could
But these Frogs were resilient, and hard to take down
They mounted a comeback, by air and by ground

Dressed in their frog skin, from helmet to cleat
The Horned Frogs tried valiantly not to get beat
Dalton threw passes like a pro quarterback
The O-line worked hard to avoid a big sack

But the Bears defense was strong, and it just wouldn’t crack
Even as TCU tried hard to come back
The Frogs’ fans were cheering as the fourth quarter came
TCU’s title hopes all hinged on this game

The Horn Frogs held mouthpieces tight in their teeth
But Griffin ran circles around them like a wreath
Coach Briles just smiled, and smothered a laugh
And looked for a moment like a younger Grant Teaff

He was happy with his team, a right jolly old coach
The Bears couldn’t be killed, like a stubborn old roach
As time ran out, the Horned Frogs hung their heads
They realized their title hopes were definitely dead

The Bears fans were humble in victory though
Just a few loud chants that they were now 3-0
TCU fans no longer looked at the Bears down their nose
As into the top 25 Baylor rose

The teams headed to their buses, and as the Baylor fans shout
The Horned Frogs and their fans could do nothing but pout
Then the Bears fans yelled out, as the buses started to roll
“TCU, see you again at the Liberty Bowl!”

Yours in the comments, I don't even have the energy. Also, keep in mind it was written by a player's mom.


Angry Trey said...

I threw up

CrabblerK3 said...

I made it through half of it before I couldn't take it anymore. What an obnoxious bit of trash. I hope we bury these losers on Saturday. Oregon v New Mexico style.

shortnkerley's said...

How do you insult something so awfully gay. It's late Friday. I'm done wasting my time with Baylor until tomorrow.

Rotten Arsenal said...

That's not even good poetry... these folks are really delusional

Tanner said...

legit question...
can someone please send this to gp?

i couldn't even read it. see you in the liberty bowl? they couldn't make it in a high school playoff game.

Angela said...

the only bit of truth to this is the part where they compare themselves to a roach. That was greatness.

gregreininger said...

I read about half of it, too dumb and too long

LA Frog said...

What?! This mom isn't from TX. Yeah, it's Baylor, but fuck -- this is TX lady. You need to understand football is a religon here. You don't do this shit in high school. Our high school girls write signs like -- "#18 is going to eat your pansy son alive" and put that banner in #18's yard the week of the game -- they don't write gay songs about their team. They deface the opposing school's mascot or field

Tanner said...

omg, the comments on the baylor website that sent the questions...

im loling all over the place here.

everything is so graphic, and the posts are all from spitblood guys.

nice work team. see you in the standing room only section tomorrow.

WhaleBurger said...

What a fucking joke. Did mama bear tuck her little cubs in tonight? She better have. Her stupid fucking cubs are about to get prison rapped.

Army Frog Fan said...

Remember that time when we had time to type up a terrible poem about a terrible team, while almost half the 1-A teams went bowling last season?

Good times...