Thursday, September 16, 2010

Players to Watch Week 3: The Baylor Bears

I mentioned a couple weeks ago when I chose not to make either one of the Rodgers brothers my player to watch that I would not pick the opposing team’s superstar players as the player to watch, but their lesser known role players who might have an impact instead. Well, it’s week 3 and I’m already breaking my own rule, because I think this is the perfect opportunity for a “Robert Griffin isn’t football Jesus and even if he is that great, Baylor still sucks” rant. Also, I’ll stick with 2 players, and pick 1 player from their defense as well, because there is a particular player on that side of the ball whos decision making and brain power need to be question...seriously. I’ll start on the defensive side of the ball and save Robert Griffin for last…

Ahmad Dixon (Fr. S, 6’ 195)


Some may question why a true freshman safety with 5 tackles on the season would be a player to watch, especially those who don’t follow recruiting. Here’s why. According to Rivals, Ahmad, who went to Waco’s Hewitt Midway High, was the 18th ranked player in Texas, the 10th ranked safety in the country, and a 4 star recruit. He had offers from everyone you could imagine (Arkansas, Alabama, LSU, OU, Texas, TCU- just to name a few). Not only that, but his recruitment made Jevan Snead/Ryan Perriloux/Nick Saban/Bobby Petrino look like guys who stick to their commitments. Now I will try to track the commitment lineage of Ahmad Dixon, who flip flops more than John Kerry.

He originally committed to Texas. He flaked on that commitment, most likely based on fears of having to sit the bench due to Texas’s secondary depth, and chose Baylor, who clearly has no depth at any position (see 2009 season for proof). Then, he spurned his original Baylor commitment for a Lebron James-esque national television commitment to the Tennessee Volunteers. It was quite the Lebron move, as he didn’t even inform the Baylor coaching staff of his flip-flop before bitch-slapping them on national TV. After the game, he informed reporters that he “hadn’t 100% de-committed from Baylor” as he hadn’t spoke to their coaches yet. Great guy, sound decision maker. Dixon’s next move: de-committing from the Volunteers and choosing Baylor, again! And it actually worked out this time, as Ahmad has been on the field for the Bears, and has been a HUGE impact player with 5 tackles, none for loss, no interceptions, no forced fumbles or recoveries (note-that sentence was dripping with sarcasm). It seems pretty clear to me that Ahmad is not concerned with winning, or he wouldn’t have chosen Baylor, obviously. He wants to play, and he wants it to be all about him, which it will be at Baylor, because once RGIII re-tears his ACL, he will be the only one there with substance. But you, Ahmad Dixon, are an idiot. You spurned several offers from legitimate winning programs and title contenders in order to be…A BAYLOR BEAR!!! Good luck with that, and Godspeed. TCU, Texas, Alabama, OU, etc will remember to send you highlight tapes from the BCS games and conference championships. Good career move. You are awarded my Dunce Cap of the season.

Robert Griffin (QB, Soph, 6’2 220, awarded redshirt after his knee was shredded).

Is there an NCAA cover jinx yet? Let's create one...

Alright, Robert, you’re good, you’re talented, and you’re athletic. I’ll give you that. But has there ever been a player pimped harder for doing less??? Oh wait, Jake Locker. I’m not even going to insult you as a player that much, because I really do think you’re a rare talent who greatly improves your team. This is more a forum for me to rip Baylor fans and their whole mentality towards football. Yes, Robert Griffin is awesome. We get that. He’s so awesome that he ripped apart defenses as a freshman 2 years ago. He did so well that he led your team to a whopping 4-8 record. The next season, supposedly the year RGIII was going to take over college football and lead Baylor to the promised land (by that, I mean the Independence Bowl), RGIII tore his ACL in a game 3 blowout of Northwestern State. Funny thing about that is, Baylor fans will tell you that had it not been for his injury, Baylor was well on their way to being world-beaters and the biggest surprise in the Big 12. What they neglect to tell you, though, is that BAYLOR HAD ALREADY LOST AT HOME TO CONNECTICUT AT HOME!!! Griffin lit up the field that day with 119 yards passing. Once again, lowly Baylor went on the finish 4-8, with 1 win in Big 12 play, proving that they really belong.

It’s not that I hate you, Robert Griffin, it’s just that I hate Baylor and everything that it stands for. So I really can’t wait to hear Baylor fans running around the tailgate scene Saturday running their mouths about how Robert Griffin is the next big thing and the biggest bad ass in the country and a Heisman frontrunner. Maybe you will be great one day, RGIII, and maybe Baylor will too (haha), but it won’t be Saturday at The Carter. So this message is to you, Baylor fans: get the Hell of your high horse, quit acting like you’ve accomplished something, stop touting the Briles/Griffin duo as the saving grace of the Baylor program, and DON’T TALK SHIT UNTIL YOU CAN WIN A DAMN BOWL GAME!!!!!! If that’s too much to ask, then at least keep quiet until you reach a bowl, or beat TCU at something.

That is all, Go Frogs! Next week, I try to find an SMU player to pick on, and unfortunately Bo Levi Mitchell is gunslinging elsewhere now.


Bumblebeetuna said...

That's about the worst way to sell a video game.

James Falbe said...
This comment has been removed by the author.