Thursday, October 18, 2007

The Unlovable Losers: TCU Basketball

Since some of you have apparently lost interest in Frogs Football, and are setting yourselves up for ridicule after "The Resurgence" that will begin tonight, I'll pass along this TCU Men's Basketball preview.
Outlook: Sandwiched somewhere between hell freezing over and the Tenacious D movie winning a lifetime achievement Oscar (which is extremely unfair that it hasn't). We're picked to finish second to last in the MWC. The MWC is not a good basketball conference. The easy/sarcastic answer to this would be that, ever since Art Pierce removed himself from the team, the feng shui has been off. The real answer is that these guys just aren't that good and have the worst coach in the entire sporting world. This includes when my dad coached my 6th grade church basketball team. I went to one game last year when we played SFA (mostly because I have a friend that plays for SFA. And when I say mostly I mean entirely) and we almost lost. I hope we lose every game this year (and only because hopefully it will lead to the removal of the topic of my next paragraph...)
Dougherty. Neil. Fucking. Dougherty. Really? This is the best we can do? Oh, but I forget, he's the best dressed man in college basketball! Suck My Ass. I feel like you all probably remember Billy Ball. We averaged like 175 points a game. Sure, the competition averaged 174 but Billy Tubbs' don't need no stinkin' defense! This guy is the bane of my TCU existence. Junior year, the last year we still had most of Tubbs' last recruiting class, was ridiculous for TCU basketball. Santee, Shrop, Aaron "Sportscenter" Curtis? Sure, we only made the NIT, but that's about as much as we can hope for. We still made the Sweet 16 in that and hung with Maryland until the last few minutes of the game. Hell, I think we were ahead at the half!
A few years back in one of my marketing classes, our job was to market the basketball team and Dougherty came in and spoke to us and, I can honestly say, I've never been more unimpressed with a "motivator." He was condescending, negative, blamed everything on the fans, and didn't stop and think that maybe he's a poor recruiter and coach. He expected to come in here and it still be Kansas. Well, Neil, we're not in... ok, I'm not going to go there. The thing about Kansas a) it's a basketball school, b) they're good, c) they don't win 5 games in a season total. d) FU, Neil. Can we pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease run this guy out of town? Even if our basketball team is terrible post Dougherty, at least I'll know we tried.
I mean, SMU may still not have the right Doherty, but at least he coached at UNC. Let's show Dougherty the Dougher.

Neil Dougherty pointing towards his next destination: The F outta here.

In other news, the TCU women's basketball team is supposed to finish second in conference which leads me to ask: Like a tree falling in the woods, if the TCU women's basketball team wins the conference, does anyone know and/or care?


Anonymous said...

no one cares about tcu hoops

Sir Wesley Willis said...

While a very valid statement, i just figure if the blog is to survive we'll have to switch gears eventually.

Lyle Lanley said...

That's not true...Drew & I are TCU hoops fans. And since I'm also a Texas Rangers fan, you can spare me the lecture on hopeless futility...